Hey there, this is Clay.

Today, I’m taking a break from the videos we’ve been posting answering your questions. Sometimes I just need to vent a few of my own ideas here :)

Mika and I just finished up a really cool project yesterday. We still have to do some polishing up and technical stuff before we’re ready to share it with you, but let me just say that this will be a total “game changer.

(Hint: It involves a 3 month trip half-way around the world that completely changed our relationship. And we’re hoping to share the same transformation with you–the trip half-way around the world is optional…)

Anyway, I’m a little relieved because, to be quite honest with you, this project has consumed nearly all of my energy for the past few months.

And now I feel like I can finally devote some more time here :)

Anyway, I was talking to a friend the other day who is uncertain about the guy she’s seeing.

She wanted to know if this is the “right” relationship for her.

I mean, maybe there’s someone else out there better for her.

Someone who says all the right things, always knows what she wants, and has that shirt-ripped-open-with-exposed-Fabio-chest physique.

How do you know if you’re in the right relationship?

It’s a tough question, and it’s definitely something that I used to struggle with myself back when I was with my ex.

I mean, part of me never really wanted to fully commit to a relationship because I wasn’t sure if she was right for me.

Now, I never cheated on her or anything like that, but I just wasn’t “all the way there,” if you know what I mean. It’s like my energy was only half there.

That relationship didn’t work out for a lot of very fundamental reasons aside from my energy, but this is a common problem that I believe a lot of people have with their relationships.

Maybe you’re just “hanging out” with your partner until someone better comes along, thinking that being with Mr. Good Enough is better than being with no one at all.

Maybe you’re clinging desperately to Mr. Oh Hell No because you’re afraid that no one else would ever love you.

Or maybe you’re actually with a really good guy, but you still just have that nagging question in the back of your mind: Is he really the right person for me?

But the thing is… just half-assing it in your relationship isn’t going to cut it.


Clay is an author, blogger, and dating and relationship coach for Loving Boldly. He is also a nap enthusiast, coffee aficionado, and home brewer.

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