I know someone who was afraid to commit to a guy she had been seeing for a while.
She didn’t want to get hurt by him, the way that she was hurt in the past by other guys.
She was frustrated by the lack of intimacy, the fact that he didn’t seem interested in being an “official couple,” and she secretly dreaded that she was just a booty call or some kind of friends with benefits to this guy.
She accused him of being emotionally unavailable, a commitment-phobe, and even selfish.
So she kept him at arm’s length.
She wanted to wait to commit to him until he committed to her.
What she didn’t realize was that, although he MAY have been an emotionally unavailable guy, she was partially responsible for creating this situation.
(And this was a bit of a recurring pattern in her life as well too.)
You see, this guy may not have been 100% emotionally there for her…
But she wasn’t 100% emotionally there for him either.